Can't fall asleep in the middle of the night so I hope with the help of blogging can make me fall asleep faster. Feeling hungry right now but I don't think will find something to eat late at night. Got plenty of pictures to be uploaded but I am so lazy to use the photobucket so I shall upload it when I really have the time to do so.

Another year end and it was the last day of the year 2009 right now. Any vision for the coming year? Any guidance to my future? Will start my master degree programme soon and seems like 2010 is going to be a very busy year for me as I have to work and study at the same time.

My recent life is so sucks as a lot of unhappy things happening to me and around me. Everytime I wanna solve it but seem things are getting even worst. The higher you are, the lesser friends you gonna have. The more you wanna control, the more you won't be able to let go. Sometimes people are not satisfied with the authority they have, they are asking for more and crossing the border line.

Dear all, don't try to mess up with me. You will gonna get it from me. By hook or by crook I will make sure you get the same thing as I get.

I am always trying my best to help things out. But do people really appreciate what I have done? Or I am actually making things getting worst?

I always tell myself to stay strong when facing with any obstacles. But it is really not easy.

When you lost something that you are having and holding it for quite some time, you will feel uneasy. Even a small thing like pen or doll that you already have some kind of feelings on it, you will feel so hard to let go.

Remember once I lost my pencil case that have been with me for many years, I cried.
Another incident was my mum urge me to throw away the 'pillow' that I have been hugging for years, I cried.

What if some day someone I love leaving me, should I be crying too?

I know this post is in a mess. I myself is in a real mess right now =(

Seems like I am neglecting my pity little bloggie. Here I am to accompany him since I have not been updating recently.

My work was so so and I begin to feel that it is not easy to enter retailing industry. You may have to sacrifice all your public holiday and stay in your workplace. Perhaps this will be a good stepping stone for me as well.

Life is just complicated sometimes. There are some unpredictable things happening but you couldn't even know how to solve it. Some choose to pretend don't know and some choose to stay away from the unsolved problems. Some even make a tough decision to let go. Which will be the correct path to be taken? Letting go? But if letting go could you make it?

Someone told me to just pretend don't know and the problem will solve by itself but I don' think is a good solution as I am the one who like to thinks alot. When I know I have the responsibility, by hook or by crook I wanna figure out a solution for it. My solution may not be a good one or may make things even worse but at least I tried to solve.

Shall call it off today.

Having complicated feelings now. Everything seems not to be in the ordinary order. Maybe this is really not a good year for me. Things are just not going smoothly.

I feel like letting go whatever I am having now.
I feel like starting a brand new life of myself.
I feel like living in my own world.
I just don't like the way I am now. Having to worry and take all the burden of nowhere.
I just want a simple life with simple mind and simple people around me.
I want to care only the people who care me.
I don't want to be rich but I need someone to support me both physically and mentally.
I don't want to contribute more than others.

Maybe I shall really let it go....... I know I can handle it all by myself.

Feel like blogging whenever I am extremely happy or sad or angry. Have my off day today. Again I went out with my mum. Another month passed by and I received my second month salary. Stepping into the third month I know that challenges are awaiting me. I am 75% adapted to my working environment and another 25% will be some uncertainties.

Sometimes the more you appreciate the more hard you gonna let go. The more you care you are the more suffer you are when you lose it. You may want to have 100% of it and yet you can only get maybe 50% of it. I know I am crapping. Even myself don't know what I am writing.

Shall end my blog here. I am in a kind of feelings that I couldn't explain. Maybe I shall work and work an work to forget all these things.

Wondering how long could I stand working in such a stressful environment. Once wrong doesn't mean I am always wrong right? People do have mistakes right?

Blogging is really a good place for you to express your feelings. After blogging it out, it will really make you feel better. I couldn't write a fantastic blog like others do. I may have grammatical errors here and there. But I will still continue to write and trying to improve myself.

Really face a lot of different troubles at my working place right now. Hope that I can really stand and stay strong =) Will try my very best!

So stress up with my current work. Heavy workload and heavy responsibilities as well. Seriously it is really not easy to survive in this company. You have to be really tough.

Every beginning of the month I will start shivering because I will start to worry that I key-ed in the wrong figure for their overtime and they will come and complain.

And when people know that you are a freshie, they will start to take advantage on you. They will assume you don't know everything. One of them said this to me, ' you are still a small kids you won't know anything. Don't try to act smart in front of me. Ever since you came you are making a lot of troubles' -.-

Ya, i may be new but certain rules and regulations I do know. And I am not making troubles but to solve up all the leftover troubles by the previous person okay? All the while they are guided with the wrong instructions and regulations. I am just the one who follow up all the undone task and yet I am the one who kena scolded?

If one day I really leaving this company I will really make sure I hand over all my things properly to my colleagues. It is really hard to settle with all the undone task where you actually do not have clues where you should start with.

Maybe I shall not complain. Everyone will face difficulties in their work too. Anyway after blogging and expressing I do feel better. Thanks to all who supports me as I grow. I will stay strong and try my best to cope up with whatever problems that I am facing right now.

Yay, another weekend and tomorrow is my only rest day of the week. Sounds pity right? No choice. That's the path that I have chosen.

Another end month and I have just finished my salary report and just in time to courier to my HQ. Hope everything will be smooth and fine. No amendment and no explanation needed. Gonna start submitting reports when I going back to work on Monday. Pending jobs are awaiting me.

Went out for a movie right after my work today. Quite some time that I last went for a movie at cinema as most of the time I was working. I do like to have some outings during my rest day no matter with my friends or family. After a tiring week of working it is kinda enjoyable when you do have some outings for you to relax yourself and to keep yourself away from the hectic workload.

Perhaps I shall only update my blog every weekend as I hardly online during weekdays. Most of the time my routine task after work is to take my shower, watch tv and go to bed. I don't even switch on my computer. That's the reason why sometimes I may be outdated with events happening in facebook or elsewhere.

Awaiting for the upcoming events and gathering. Cheers my friends. !!

OMG. nearly one whole month that I never update my blog. Reason being is that I was quite busy with my work. More and yet more things to learn. After a month working as management trainee I am kinda adapted to the environment. Because of manpower shortage at my workplace, I may have to cover on behalf of them. Sometimes I may have to go all the way to the warehouse and check all the incoming stock.

Being one of the youngest employees in my workplace does give me some kind of unknown pressure. How am I going to handle all the people that are more experienced than me and to mix up with them?

It seems that my english is deproving as sometimes I don't even know how to draft a simple email to be sent to headquarter. I am using some simple and yet broken english.

Maybe my plan of furthering my studies will come true next year as I am planning to take part time course for my MBA. Wondering whether I can handle both work and my studies at the same time but will try my best to cope it up.

With piece of here and there and here I am to complete this blog =x Stay tunes for the next update =/

Have been MIA recently because I was quite busy with my work. A happy belated 21st birthday to me =) Busy till I don't even have the time to really celebrate.

Every end of the month is really troubling. Learning how to generate salary, planning management time table, planning foreign workers manpower requisitions, settling conflicts among staffs and plus the upcoming stock take really driving me crazy. Tons of things to be done, tons of documents to be signed..

Anyway I shall stop complaining. Will have a longer posting when I really have the time to do so. Stay tunes =)

Regretted. I should really read properly before I make any decision. What to do now?

Already two weeks I have started my work. Encountered all kind of ups and downs. Challenges are ahead of me as I am reporting to my own outlet on this coming Monday. Tomorrow will be my last day to learn and to ask whatever I am not clear regarding my job scopes and responsibilities.

Sometimes I feel like letting go. As time passing by things are changing as well. It may not be what it used to be. The kind of feelings are just different from the past. Ya, I admit sometimes I like to think a lot of nonsenses and so I hope what in my mind are craps and they won't happen. Maybe you are right. We shall not think and keep going. Things may turn out to be better.

I do enjoy listening to some soothing songs but whenever I listen to such songs, the feeling is kinda weird. For no reason you may feel sad. I may seem tough when handling things but in fact I am kinda soft inside. I need guidance and support too.

Quite exhausted after 2 weeks of working but when you try to think the good side of it you will actually feel better. I admit things are just getting different after I start working and I hope I can cope with all the differences and make my life better and do not let anyone or anything to interfere me.

Hope the day where I can write a fantastic blog of my own will come soon as I am still using broken english here and there to come out with a piece of blog. May all my wishes come true. I am kinda excited to my coming birthday. I know I may not have any celebration but I do hope the day will come soon.

Another tiring week. 2 consecutively full days from morning to night and one morning shift but back at 7.30pm. Back to my own outlet today to rush some paperwork to be submitted to HQ. Things are all messed up as I haven't actually reporting to my own outlet.

My challenging tasks continue from day to day. First day helping out in my own outlet really troubles me. We can really face different kind of different situations there.

Hope I can really adapt myself to this working environment and not to give up =)

Shall end my blog here.

Looks like I am going to describe more and more bout my daily job in my upcoming post. Was kinda envy when I saw all my former secondary classmates were actually enjoying their lives:
Some already engaged;
Some planning to get married soon;
Some seems to be so free with their work that they can online and facebook-ing or uploading their blog during their work hours;
Some can even sign in their msn during their working hours;
Some still studying in local universities;
Some studying abroad and planning to continue their masters;
Some are traveling overseas;
etc....

But one thing I am quite relieve is that I am no longer jobless anymore. At least I found myself a job. My job may not sound so wonderful like many others do but I do enjoy it so far. More for me to learn and to adapt to this total new working environment.

Spent my off-day with my families; we had our breakfast, lunch and dinner together. Although I can only spend one full day with them, I was able to share all the things that I encountered during my work with them and tell them bout my job scope and description. It is really a superb sunday staying at home =)

And one more thing, my grandpa was so impressed when he knew that I found a job in Ipoh. He kept on asking me about my salary, when can I get my salary, what am I working as, where I work, what is my working hours, ........ At least I do not disapoint him. I found myself a job and I guess he is kinda proud of me too. By looking at his facial expression I can feel the happiness inside his heart. Don't worry, I will try my best to keep up my good work.

A special thanks to all my friends and families that have been supporting me since I was small. 18 more days I am officially an adult, turning into 21 years old. Don't call me xiao mei mei anymore and don't start to call me aunty as well. It is kinda saddening when people is calling you aunty when you are only 21 years old =(

Shall end my blog here!

Yay, I don't have to work tomorrow. Super duper good news for me. Perhaps my work is the most tiring work compare to all my previous schoolmates. Almost every day I don't have my lunch or dinner on time. It seems like I am the businesswoman working from day to night. =x Ya, to be frank, my work is kinda tiring as I have to work from 10-10 almost every day. Many things to be learned and my things to be taken over.

Was planning what am I going to do for this precious one-day off per week. I shall spend all my time sleeping at home. Don't ask me to go any supermarkets as I am already in my own company's supermarket every day from checking warehouse to staying at office doing all the paper works.

1 more week of training and I am going back to my respective branch to start my routine there. No more senior over there and maybe I have to settle my own lunch and dinner myself =(

I shall really stay firm and tough. That's one of my job requirements. I shall not let any people to have chance to bully me. And I shall have a more mature look so that all people will scare at me.

Shall end my blog here.

Feeling better now. A big thanks to Kenny G and all my tears that have been sacrificed =x Hoping for the best =) I shall not care anymore!!!

I need some soothing music to accompany me to sleep tonight!!!!

Super damn pissed off and not in good mood now. Allow me to express my feelings over here.

I hate you for not waiting.
I hate you for not concerning.
I hate you for not letting me to let go my pissed feelings.

Because of you I have to sacrifice my precious time.
Because of you I have to cry silently.
Because of you I have to bear with all the scoldings.
Because of you I have to learn to let go.
Because of you I have to learn not to put you in the important place.
Because of you I have to adjust everything.

HATE YOU!!!!

Working Day 1

I failed my mission to update my blog daily as I started working yesterday. My work was extremely exhausted as I am working in a retail outlet. My working hours are long, I need to work for extra days especially festive season and my workloads are quite alot too.

When I first stepped into the outlet yesterday, the security guard shouted at me. Oh well, he thought I am one of the promoters there and he disallowed me for bringing my handphone in. He shouted something like this, "Hey don't you know handphones are not allowed?" LOL. After that only I found out that all employees from the management side are allowed to bring their handphones in. AND when the guard got to know my position, his attitude was like 360 degree changed. OKAY FINE! Bear with him as I am still a freshie.

As for my lead supervisors, all of them do taught me a lot of things. They even brought me out for lunch and ask someone to take care of me when both of them are not free. I really appreciate them for teaching me all my individual responsibilities. I am currently undergoing a 2 weeks training lead by my supervisors. After that I have to transfer to another outlet where no one will actually lead me. Perhaps no one will bring me out for lunch too =(

Although my work is kinda tiring, I found it quite challenging. This is because I am not only handling with all the paper work, I have to deal with some people as well. And most of all, working in this department is really my area of interest. I have been telling my friends and family that I hope I can actually join this department after graduating and there I am, stepping into the door of this department.

More and more things for me to absorb and I hope I can really deal with it well =)

7 Things I Hate about YOU , YOU and YOU!

Seriously not in good mood now. I think bout one whole week I am in this kind of mood. ARGH!!!!!! No one knows no one cares and no one gonna bother.

I hate people using vulgar in front of me especially those who are very very close with me. You can scold vulgar whenever you want but not in front of me okay? I hate it!!! I couldn't stand it when you are speaking in front of me. ARGH!!!

I hate people sh0wing off in front of me too, telling me how many times they have been to how many places, telling me how knowledgeable they are, AND ESPECIALLY THOSE MAPLERS, telling me how high level their main are. Ya, I don't have a very very high level character in maple. I am not level200 and I am just a noob bishop, SO STOP SHOWING OFF IN FRONT OF ME!

I hate it when people know I am in a bad mood and pretend nothing happened. Ya, I did mentioned I don't like consoling from people as console will make me feel more uncomfortable. But at least a 'How are you my dear? Don't feel sad. Everything will be fine soon' will do.

I hate the feeling of waiting. Can you just give me a specific time so that I don't have to wait for whole day for nothing? Or just a notification telling me you will be late or you won't be able to make it at that time or whatsoever and not letting people to wait for you? Do you know the importance of being punctual?

I hate it when someone show no concern to me. I need their love and care. I need their guidance and support too. I hope when I need them they can just stay beside me, showing me the right path to take, the right decision to make, to entertain me by telling me some lame jokes perhaps, to accompany me when I am bored and most of all to cheer me up whenever I am sad.

I hate people who shows over concern to me as well. Over concern meaning asking things that have nothing to do with them. I don't like people asking nonsense especially asking about my personal life. My personal life is none of their business right? My personal life won't affect your daily life right? What for you so busybody asking for it? That's my private things okay?

I hate those selfish people too. They only think of their feelings and never care bout you. They will leave you just because they wan to pursue their own dreams. You have to wait for them because they are not free to entertain you.

Seem like I am really good at writing an emo blog. Emo kid rocks!!!

Perhaps the best thing to do to pass my leisure time is to blog blog and blog. As promised I shall update my blog more often.

Early this morning received a call from one of the companies that I went for interview. Good thing to say I got the job. Gonna start working next Tuesday, 1st of September. Hope it will be a very very good start for me to start my first job. Really have to enjoy the last few days slacking at home as I have no more time to slack when I start working.

Suddenly mapling sounds so alien to me. I wonder why I can stay whole day in front of the computer mapling and leveling but I couldn't do it now. Trained few minutes and I feel is kinda bored d.

Oh ya, some pictures to share with every one of you. I went Indulgence last weekend with my family and the whole dinner cost like rm1k plus. Pretty expensive right? For those who have been there will know.


















































Shall end my blog here. Stay tunes for my updates. Bye peeps!

Seems like my blog is getting dead and dead from day to day so perhaps is time for me to update what am I doing right now. Just came back from China last sunday and was recharging my battery. Sleep and rest at home most of the day that I do not even walk out from my doorstep.

The weather in China was superb hot. Even without the sun you will still sweat all day round. Back to Malaysia where it was raining for the past few days was really a good time for me to rest and sleep to the max.

Whenever I on my msn and the first question people will ask,' hey dear, you working or studying now?' I have been floating with this question since I graduated. Well, I am still slacking. neither do I work nor study. Currently I am looking for job in ipoh since I found that it is best to work in the place you belong. Bout the further studies thingy I have to put it aside.

Read back at some of my previous post, it reminded of one of my post saying that someone said I am 30years old. Well, till now I am thinking is it a compliment or?? Maybe that time I was in my curly curly aunty hair. LOL.

I encountered the same incident but this time it was the other way round. I went to one of the pubs in Shanghai with my tourmates. I was wearing t-shirt with shorts and sandals with a red sling bag or i shall describe it as a casual travelling look? Then the waitress there stared at me with a very weird look and told my friend, 'Hey! children are not allowed in this pub?' OMG, CHILDREN??? Am i still a child? Well, again is this a compliment?

Well well well, 1 more month I am proudly to step into the floor of genting casino. wahahaa. I have been waiting waiting and waiting for this day to come ever since my friends are going casino and I have to stay outside playing maple. LOL Finally I am 21 years old. It may be signal that I am getting older but who cares? Coz I still have a young heart. OMG OMG i am abit over. Bear with me my peeps =)

Shall end my blog here and shall try my best to update more regularly. Yay, is friday tomorrow and I adore fridays and weekends. Enjoy your holidays my dear!

Trip to ShangHai

I am not going to write a long long post as pictures will show you all everything =)

Day 1

@ pan euro before departing


my boarding pass to pudong, shanghai airport


my first breakfast on plane


@ pudong, shanghai airport








the 'biggest' prawn =x




















first night @ suzhou

Day 2

suzhou silk factory



































oh gosh! 'smelly' taufu~











second night @ nanjing



Day 3

changjiang bridge
































third night @ wuxi

Day4





































the greatest performance at hangzhou




















one of the luxurious cars in china but i forgot how much it costs


forth night @ hangzhou





yay, Mcd spicy pork burger =)

Day 5



















captured this on the way to shanghai when we stuck on a traffic jam











@ nanjing road. the scenery there was superb














our last night @ shanghai








our daily compliment mineral water =)


back to klia =)

Shall end my post here.